Mishy's travels in Alaska

Some photos of Alaska

2005-12-20T18:12:00.000-09:00

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This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from Michelle R tagged with winter. Make your own badge here.

2005-10-06T18:53:00.000-08:00

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Code

2005-06-19T22:44:00.000-08:00

So I took this class in web design, and my prof was all about me messing with the "code" to change stuff around, but I'm all about not fixin' what ain't broke, and leaving all those little letters the way that they are. Maybe they WANT to be like that? maybe my picture doesn't LIKE padding around it. Like it's clostaphobic or something, and HAY. Besides, what's the fun of a code if you don't have a decoder ring? I mean, really?

Angst-ridden artist

2005-06-19T22:36:00.000-08:00

I used to want to be an artist. An angst ridden artist, with the moodeyness and the dark past, and the solutitude, but then I got myself some solutitude, and some dark things to happen in my past, and, you know, angst ain't all it's cracked up to be, it seems, and now I want to a socor mom.

A real conumdrum

2005-06-19T22:27:00.000-08:00

I am having a real conumdrum.
What if I do something good, and I want to use a personalised adjective, to be cool and so forth, and I can't decide between "Mishy-tastic" or "Mish-a-rific"? What do I do then? Oh, the humanity!

Stocks and bonds

2005-06-17T22:36:00.002-08:00

EBay should sell the things that we really want. “Eternal love, $40. Reserve not yet met.” Like that. Or wishes. EBay never sells wishes. Of course, having been four at one point, I would use it to wish for three more wishes and then keep doing that until I had stockpiled enough to go public. Get ready Wall Street, when these babies go public, they won’t know what hit them.

far away

2005-06-17T22:36:00.001-08:00

My job says that I serve students in rural and remote districts. One student asked me
“What’s ‘remote’?” and I answer
“It kind of mean’s ‘far away’”.
“Am I remote?” He asked.
“Yup.”
“What do I live far away from?” And you know, I couldn’t’ really answer him, except to say that he lived far away from me, but of course, I live far away from him, so it’s kind of a silly phrase.

Cutting to the chase

2005-06-17T22:36:00.000-08:00

Personals website aren’t up to snuff, in my opinion. The questions are so random and broad. Like they ask what his favorite movie is. Who cares? I’m nearing 30, time to do away with the niceties, and just ask if he’ll mow the lawn, help me raise the grandchildren that my parents have been asking me about since I was 5, and say things like “honey, is it just me, or are your legs getting longer and more slender?’

Having a cause

2005-06-17T22:35:00.000-08:00

He was very concerned about air pollution. The bumper stickers on his bike said so. He would corner people at parties, scolding them for driving gas-guzzling SUV’s. He biked everywhere, “as a statement” he said.
That and he couldn’t afford a car.

Housework

2005-06-03T21:06:00.000-08:00

A great addition to my life would be a narrator. Someone with a deep voice who gives melodramtic romance novel comenteries to everything I do.
“Lustfully, she grabbed the casirole dish, and plunged it into the steaming dishwater of the sink, brushing awburn hair form her forhead.” Like that.
because that would encorage me to do a lot more housework.

Greatness

2005-06-03T20:50:00.000-08:00

Assuming that the slip of paper pulled from the fortune cookie had wisdom and foresight, I am to rise to greatness.
I know great women. She throws dinner parties, and each guest has a tiny crystal salt and peppershaker. She hears a rumbling under her SUV’s hood, and so she take out a wrench, and go to work. Gracefully.
She is coy and sexy when she wants to be, and strong and independent when she needs to be.
I am not that woman.
Not yet.
People come to my parties, and I grab lawn chairs to seat them. My car puffs away still on the single oil change it received during it’s 120,000 mile epic journey. I blush and stammer at the mention of intimacy, and cling to the people I love like a cat in a thunderstorm.
But yet, the fortune cookie says I can change.
Thank you fortune cookie.
For starting my on my journey toward greatness.

Some more wonderings about gender and super herross

2005-05-20T20:13:00.000-08:00

The first time I fell while rock climbing, I called helplessly toward the heavens, “Somebody save me!”, and waved my fragile little hands as if trying to flag down a celestial bus. Out of the blue came Superman, who scooped up my wilted female body in his big arms. I nestled my tired head against his massive, spandex-covered shoulder.
“Don’t worry ma’am,. As long as there are women in trouble, I will be there to save and protect them.” He flew me to safety, and placed me on the sandy ground like fine china.
But the second time I fell while rock climbing, the Justice league dispatch sent Wonder Woman, who had been in the area giving leadership seminars to a Girl Scout troop.
I lay there, broken and little on the ground, as she stood over me, unimpressed, her hands on her hips.
“You don’t need to be ‘rescued’, you need to empower yourself, and learn from this experience, so that you can feel confident, and can “save” yourself. Instead of enabling you and shielding you from the results of your fall, here is a bag of climbing chalk, and a good climbing harness. Now I’ll be right here spotting you wile you climb your self-empowered self right down that mountain.”
I looked at her. I looked at the climbing harness.
Crap. Where’s Superman?

Thank you camera

2005-05-14T23:14:00.000-08:00

For focusing in on the interesting rocks in the background, and bluring out the boring scene of the bears fighting. I think it adds interest.

Is it more wrong...

2005-05-12T16:33:00.000-08:00

Is it more wrong to kill a horse than a wasp? How come? Please discuss.

The sign at the trailhead

2005-05-10T20:01:00.000-08:00

I went hiking today, to find the most beautiful things to photograph, and the sign at the trailhead made grand, sweeping promises about the view, and the moose, and the so forth, and so I hiked, straight uphill for ten miles, and by ten I mean two because I was alone, and I never saw anything, but each corner looked more promising than he next, and when I was so tired that my little legs couldn’t carry me an inch more, a sign told me that I had taken the wrong trail, the trail that just leads to more trail, and not the trail that leads to beautiful things. So I turned back, and although the hike there had been beautiful, the hike back was ugly.

The meaning of life

2005-05-09T15:29:00.001-08:00

Feeling kinda contemplative today, I have asked Goggle to explain the meaning of life to me. He (‘cause, in my opinion, he so has to be a guy) offers the following words of wisdom: “happiness or flourishing; love; compassion; pleasure; power; knowledge, understanding, or wisdom; and being blessed, or achieving union with God or the divine; or simply that there is no meaning to life”. Hmmmmm. How refreshing to just have such a weighty question answered in so few words, and so concretely. Do I agree? I think it depends of what stage of life you are in. Sometimes, Love is the most important thing, but sometimes, it’s success, or wisdom, or feeling blessed, each of which I had at some point, and each of which I have been without too. I think that we search for what we need at the moment, or what will feed out current hunger.
I envy Goggle, for not pondering, and letting things be. Other questions should be answered like that too: “If God is almighty, Can he (or she) create a rock that he can’t pick up?” Goggle ponders this “Ummmm. No.” And that is that. Goggle, “what is art?” Goggle ponders this, points to the poster of a fish on my office wall, and answers “stuff like that.” “Goggle, if we are evolving so that we will live long and healthy lives, then how did we develop eating disorders, hereon addictions, and suicide?” And Goggle says “Ummmmmm ask your mother.”

The internet and all

2005-05-09T15:29:00.000-08:00

The internet is cool and all, with the blogs, and the getting a job online and stuff. But I'm not gonna be fully impressed until I can teliport mylsef places. That would a be a great feture for EBay to offer too, to teliport your stuff to you, so you don't have to wait and wait for Mr. Lazypants EBay man to mail your SCUBA gear.

Little ant

2005-05-09T15:25:00.000-08:00

When people are standing on the top of the Empire State Building, or another skyscraper, they always say that the people look like ants. That's kind of stupid. Ants are black, and have three body parts, and skurry acrss the ground. people aren't. And you never hear the oppisite. You never hear people saying "look at all those ants. They look just like people if I was standing of the top of the Empire State Building." like that.

You know what doesn't happen enough?

2005-05-08T00:24:00.000-08:00

You know what doesn't happen enough, is that I'm sitting in my office, and a I get a call over the loud speaker that some guy has left a big ol' boquet of flowers at the front desk for me, but I don't know who they're from, because they could be from several guys, so I ask the woman at the front desk to explain him.
That.

Things that sound exciting about SCUBA diving

2005-04-29T15:57:00.000-08:00

I signed up for a SCUBA diving class, and this is why that's cool:
-You get to strap a big ol' diving knife to your thigh.
-The rest of the reasons don't even matter.

Things that I have thunk today

2005-04-29T14:30:00.000-08:00

I think I'm going to use "thunk" as the past tense of "think" from now on.
My thumb nail is kind of growing in funky.
It must stink to be a lesbian, and not be able to go to the bathroom during a double date and ask your friend's advice about your date, or about if your hair looks OK cause your date might walk in.
I think light blue is a good color for me. It also looks snazzy on my blue bike.
Boy, my secretary rocks. Way to mother me.
When you BBQ shrimp, are you supposed to buy raw shrimp, or cooked, pink shrimp? I'll bring raw shrimp. That sounds right.
jealousy
anger
jealousy
relaxation
PMS crampy
nostalgia
smiley
happy
hunger
fullness
jealousy
guilt
curiosity
rush-ing-ment (had that been a word)
shock
joy
bloggey
horney
kind of board
wanting to go home-ness
anticipation
smugness
and that brings me up to now. Boy. I guess that jealousy seems to be a theme today. And I seems to have really yo-yoed. That reminds me. I haven't practiced my water yoyo today. Gotta go do that. Any emotion is happier when you've got a water yoyo.

Names

2005-04-28T16:13:00.000-08:00

I always thought it was lame that your parents get to name you. I like "Tribe" this online chat room I use, cause you can pick you name, and everyone refers to you by that. I mean, you can pick anything from "runs with scissors" to "Mishy". You can even change your name to fit your mood. feeling vulnerable? You can be "beautiful one". Feeling sunny? You can be "Spring is here!!!!". How cool. Like should imitate art more, or in this case, Tribe.

Did you know that a person can MAKE marshmellows?

2005-04-23T20:44:00.000-08:00

Marshmallows Recipe

Ingredients
3 envelopes of Knox gelatin
1/2 cup cold water
2 cups granulated sugar
2/3 cups corn syrup
1/4 cup water
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
Confectioners' sugar for dredging
Instructions
In the bowl of an electric mixer, sprinkle gelatin over 1/2 cup cold water. Soak for 10 minutes. Combine sugar, corn syrup, and 1/4 cup water in a small saucepan. Bring to a boil and boil hard for 1 minute. Pour boiling syrup into gelatin and mix at high speed. Add the salt and beat for 12 minutes. Add vanilla and incorporate into mixture. Scrape into a 9 x 9-inch pan lined with oiled plastic wrap and spread evenly. (Note: Lightly oil hands and spatula or bowl scraper). After pouring marshmallow mixture into the pan, take another piece of plastic wrap and press mixture into the pan.
Let mixture sit for a few hours. Remove from pan, dredge the marshmallow slab with confectioners' sugar and cut into 12 equal pieces with scissors (the best tool for the job) or a chef's knife. Dredge each piece of marshmallow in confectioners' sugar.

TGIF

2005-04-22T14:26:00.000-08:00

My body's here, but my mind is all cozy in my bed.

My wild and crazy morning

2005-04-22T14:13:00.000-08:00

I've been pretty wild and crazy today. I had to use the lady's room, and I threw caution to the wind and used a stall that I had never tried before. After my adventure, I polled my co-workers, and found that many people don't share my favorite stall, but have one of their own. Other people rotate stalls. How intriguing. I figured that I had better take a poll:

Ways to know that your boots aren’t warm enough

2005-04-21T14:11:00.000-08:00

Your big toe has frosty breath.
Your feet are not only feeling kind of numb, but they have gone to counseling about it.
Your toe ring is suing because of unsafe working conditions.
The thermometer on your zipper pull says it’s absolute zero, and instead of your bunny boots, you brought the Sorrels.
You chew wintergreen gum to WARM your feet.
People call you “ol’ chilly feet” instead of “ol’ chilly lips”. (see my post by the same name)
A photographer offers to feature you on the cover of “icey feet weekly”.
It’s so cold, that ALL of your little piggies decided to stay home.

Ol’ Chilly lips

2005-04-20T16:34:00.000-08:00

I figured out a new nickname for myself, since Mishy is SO last month. The zipper pull on my parka has attached to it, among other things, a little tube of chapstick in a neoprene holder. Well, I was feeling like my lips might be a getting’ chapped, probably a result of the wait in the Shungnak “airport”, which, at the time, consisted on the sled in which I had been brought there. So I go to put it on, and it was so cold, that none of the chapstick would come off. It was like a stick of cold. So now I call myself ol’ chilly lips, because it sounds like a cool nickname. “Sexy bottom” does too, but I figure that people would know I gave it to myself.

Near the tree line

2005-04-20T13:03:00.000-08:00

I was in Shungnak this morning, a little village in the arctic. I had spoken with Jace about what it means to be above the tree line. This is a might sparce forest, but it looks kind of cool. For more of my photos from that trip, you can go to:http://www.flickr.com/photos/mtradin.

Things that signal bad news about the horse you’ve betted on.

2005-04-20T12:48:00.000-08:00

His name is “Pushing up daisies”
The man sitting next to you comments on how nice you are to have faith in a horse on his last race before the glue factory.
The jockey brings a novel
The gate opens at the start of the race, and your horse is facing the wrong way,
The loan shark who you hope to pay back with your winnings just breaks your legs before the horse takes off.
The horse’s owner makes money on the side with his lemonade stand.

Indications that an episode of Smallville is going badly

2005-04-20T12:35:00.001-08:00

Clark discovers a new power, that when he flicks a light switch, it suddenly becomes brighter in the room...
Although Lex isn’t going to turn “bad” in this episode, they promised that he will be partially cranky.
The previews announced a special “extended” episode, which takes place in the Talon, and where Lona and Chloe each discuss their feeling for Clark for two hours.
Clark discovers some tan kryptonite, which is like green kryptonite, but much, much less potent, and it gives Clark a belly ache.
Clark doesn’t show his chest.

Ways to coerce information from a Muppet.

2005-04-20T12:35:00.000-08:00

Take out a pair of pliers, and look menacingly at Bert’s bottle cap collection.
Ask Miss Piggy if she’s ever tried frog’s legs.
Tell Super Grover that you doubt his powers are real, and hold him over the edge of a building.
Ask Ernie if he thinks his rubber ducky will feel so squeaky when he’s bound and gagged.
Force feed Big Bird medication for schizophrenia so he’ll never see Snuffy again.
Tell Oscar that you need bait for your fishing trip next weekend, and ask him if Lowly is feeling lucky.

My new counter

2005-04-17T22:29:00.000-08:00

So I'm all about my new counter. I just found out that it keeps track of visiters, BWHAHAHA. and if they are new, or "returning". In the last week, I had 2 returning visitors. One, I know, is my mother. That makes sence, because she gave birth to me, and raised me and stuff. The second I don't know. Maybe it's a fan! Maybe they want info on joining the Mishy fan club. if you are he or she, please contact my agent about having me appear at your next function. I do a GREAT Wonder Woman.

Thank you bed

2005-04-17T22:08:00.000-08:00

For not being six inches to the left, or I would have hit my head wehn I triped and went down.

Doesn't this make you have to pee?

2005-04-17T22:06:00.000-08:00

http://www.sound-effect.com/sounds/city/Streams/rain.wav

Preemies

2005-04-17T21:32:00.000-08:00

On Saturday (yesterday) I took the coolest workshop on understanding preemies. It’s actually very important, because even simple things like listening to your voice, or looking at you face is very taxing. Which seems strange, but not if you think about where he would rather be, which is not born yet. He isn’t supposed to have to handle these things yet. It’s actually so taxing, that when a preemie is spoken to, and becomes over stressed, he will actually stop growing and developing until he is back in a restful state. The baby can develop 33% slower if these subtle clues are not paid attention to. Also, preemies are developing their senses of hearing and vision, (which is supposed to develop in uterio). They can develop learning disabilities later on in life, if they have to process hearing and vision a lot at the same time, the presenter said, because the pathways in the brain get crossed.
Things that signal that the baby is over stimulated and needs a rest:
A quick color change from pink to dark red or gray. This happens in, like a split second. It’s really striking.
The baby splays his fingers and toes apart and extends his arms.
The baby turns his head away, or puts his arms over his eyes (even premies can do this!)
Then, if he is not given a break, he will go limp as his body shuts down to help protect him. It’s not a bad thing, it’s kinda of a protective thing. Like my noise canceling headphones on a bush plane.
Ways to calm a preemie: Stop rocking, moving, talking or looking at him and making faces.
Hold his knees firmly against his belly, and his bent arms against his belly in the…um..fetal position, which seems aptly named.
Press firmly but gently on the top of his little head (usually the size of a large orange). They LOVE this, because it reminds them of the fetal position, where they would be suspended upside down, and compacted in this position. When I did this to one little baby, he smiled really hard and closed his eyes like he was sunbathing on the beach. It is so strikingly a restful, here-I-am-sunning-myself face. He was so cute and slumpy.

A fellow blogger

2005-04-17T20:17:00.000-08:00

I saw This post from a pooooooooooooooooor other blogger who feels like he never get any hits. poor him. I haven't read all of his blog yet, but here's a link:
geekjosh.blogspot.com

shank bone

2005-04-17T19:44:00.000-08:00

Part of the Passover Seder calls for a shank bone, basically the top of the leg bone of a sheep. But you only should have the BONE, not the meat, and it has to be burned. So I get the shank bone from the store (it shocked me that Anchorage actually has something Jewish), and it has a fair amount of meat on it. It was kind of like a humongous lamb chop. The first I ate, because mmmmmm, humongous lamb chop. but I couldn't get all of the meat off the bone. Sitka, my roommate's doggie was ALL about helping me perform this import part of the ritual. She doesn't really strike me as a Jewish doggie, maybe she's Unitarian. But she was all "Oh! mememememememememememememe!" Like that. When my roommate gets home, I'm gonna ask him if it's OK, because Sitka, like many women these days, is on a low carb diet, and only eats certain things. That, and I’m a little touched that she seems to like my cooking.

My new counter

2005-04-16T20:36:00.000-08:00

Some thaughts on the four "sons" from the haggadah

2005-04-16T17:01:00.000-08:00

I am putting together my Haggadah for next week's Seder, and I got a gient lot of haggadas from Ebay, and I found something kinda interesting. The Questions asked by the four children are usually translated the same, unless they have been intentionally changed in a Haggada written around a theme, such as the Holocaust or feminism. The answers are not. Maybe we changed the way we relate to our children. The best example is the answer to the child who is describes in different Haggadas as “rebellious”, “wicked”, “selfish”, “irreverent”, and “mean”, all very different, some very loaded terms. The answer to his or her question, are also very different; everything from “For me, not for him, for had he been there in Egypt, he would not have deserved to be saved.” (published in 1959), to “We celebrate Passover because we feel that God freed each of us from slavery. We try to find a personal meaning in the story of Passover.”(1999).

REWARD OFFERED

2005-04-16T12:57:00.000-08:00

I am offering your choice of three really big hugs, or 1/2 hour of sweing/mending service in exachange for anyone who makes me a root beer cake.

A bit nippy

2005-04-15T22:29:00.000-08:00

So I'm going to a little village in the arctic on monday for work, and so I'm thinking "how cold can it be? It's APRIL." So I Look it up, and the forcast is -23 including windchill, and I'm thinking, that the -23 has kinda lost it's appeal, it being April 'n all. Stupid winter boots. Stupid fur ruff. Stupid snow. At least it will be sunny, sighhhhhhhhh.

MMMMMMM Root Bear cake

2005-04-15T21:00:00.000-08:00

Root Beer Cake

From Arielle's Recipe Archives

Time: 1-2 hours
Serves: 10

Ingredients

Instructions

1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
pinch salt
2 eggs
1 cup root beer (do not use diet)
3/4 cup packed light brown sugar
1/4 cup (1/2 stick) unsalted butter, softened
1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
Heat oven to 350 degrees. Grease an 8-inch spring form pan.

For cake, sift together the flour, baking soda and salt; set aside. Put 1 cup root beer in a small saucepan; boil, uncovered, until it is reduced to 1/2 cup, about 5 minutes. Cool to lukewarm.

Beat brown sugar and butter in large bowl of an electric mixer on high speed until light and fluffy, about 2 minutes. Add the eggs, one at a time, mixing well after each addition. Stop the mixer and add the reduced root beer and vanilla. Mix just to combine. Fold in the dry ingredients with a rubber spatula.

Transfer batter to prepared pan. Bake until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean, 45 to 50 minutes. Cool 5 minutes. Poke holes all over top with a toothpick. Brush with about 3 tablesppons of the root beer. Remove the sides from the pan and cool cake completely.

For frosting, mix 6 tablesppons root beer, confectioners' sugar, butter and vanilla in a small bowl to make a thin frosting. Spread over top of cooled cake, letting it drip down the sides.

Hearing aids

2005-04-15T15:57:00.000-08:00

When your hearing aids have been in the sun. and then you put then into your ears, they feel extra great, like a little hug for your ears.

Sunlight

2005-04-15T15:52:00.000-08:00

isn't a thing, it's a frame of mind.

shameful

2005-04-15T15:51:00.000-08:00

If I was homeless, and found myself eating on the sidewalk, I would try to think of it as a picknick, so it wouldn’t be a shameful thing, but deep down inside, I would still know that I was homeless, because some things are always with you.

Little fly

2005-04-15T15:36:00.000-08:00

There was a little fly trying to get out of my bedroom window this morning. He was trying and banging and banging. Some people are like that, they just keep banging and banging, without trying to go around the window. So I gave him encouragement, but not help. "You go, little fly. leave the window, and fly through the garage and then you'll be free." but I didn't try and help him do that, I just lie there offering verbal encouragement, and the fly died trying to get out, or maybe from banging his head so many times, because he didn’t really understand me, and I was wasn't really tying to be understood. I was trying to make myself feel suportive, but didn't really care about the fly. Some people are like that. But not me.

New template

2005-04-14T22:47:00.000-08:00

Today I was feeling kind of funky and wild, so I changed my template to reflect my peppyness.

a twitch

2005-04-14T21:59:00.000-08:00

I’m reading The Diving Bell and the Butterfly. It’s about a middle-aged man who looses almost all of his mobility due to an injury. He communicates by blinking his left eye.
I keep hoping that if I was in his shoes, that someone would be clever and understanding enough to give credence to my blinking. What if people just said “oh, her brain is messed up, she’s twitching again.”, and I would think what I’m beginning to believe my students think-“you dumbass, stop calling me “____ey”, and look at my eye blinking.”
By then I was relieved. The people from work would come over, and mess with me until they found the blink, and maybe other things too, and hook me up to all these fancy-shamcy eye-blink-activated computers, and I would be babbling senselessly just like BEFORE my injury. Then they would show video clips of me to nurses who think I don’t even have cause and effect, and say that it’s my RIGHT to communicate.
First, I would ask about my injury. Is it permanent? What is the fastest, most effective way for me to communicate? And the people from work would tell me that, quadriplegic or not, I was a DEAF HARD-OF-HEARING Specialist, and I shouldn’t go about asking questions about things I am not trained in.

If everyone was like me

2005-04-14T21:58:00.000-08:00

If everyone in the world was like me, we wouldn’t have to go through all these security checks to get into an airplane. Instead, the airport would be full of billboard-sized neon signs saying “Did you remember your purse?”

Only light refreshments will be served on this flight

2005-04-13T22:49:00.001-08:00

Oh little Danish
on my tray,
like a glue-filled burrito
or a glob of wet clay.

Alaska Folk Art Festival

2005-04-13T22:49:00.000-08:00

Tonight, I was traveling to Juneau at the same time as the Alaska Folk Art Festival. WhoooHooo! It was a blast, and the best part was that it was four hours long, with each band only playing fro 15 minutes, so there was a great variety of music, everything from a woman who sang about not wanting to be pampered by men, but wanting a best friend who can help her skin a moose, to a family who fiddled “cruella deVille” From 101 delimitations. Tonight was “blues night”, and I was siked. I even bought a t-shirt, and got the illustrator to sign it.
It was kind of a family event, full of young adults, but also their little kids. They had set up an area for the kids to dance, to keep them interested. It was great. Boy, can three years olds dance. They danced with complete confidence, just to feel their bodies move, and not for others, or even themselves, the way dancing should be. It was like a very very short mosh pit. The best part is when one particularly enthusiastic three or four year old, I’m guessing, yells out “Shake what your momma gave you!”

Yurgonnawanna

2005-04-13T22:34:00.000-08:00

Traveling a lot by myself, I often stop and ask for directions, or are given directions to a school or hotel. Most people are really helpful, but many are not. Here’s things that don’t help:

The vague direction-giver- Usually starts with “Yurgonnawanna go alllllllllllllllll the way around the place, and then turn right, but not ALL the way right, until you see the grass and the stuff, then yurgonnawanna go straight for a ways, and then not, like it’s a left, but not…”

The landmark giver- This person describes all the things you will pass, but not where to turn or merge. “You know the Jones house, where they have the dog team, and a gray fence that he never paints like he should? OK, go past that…”

The Sourdough-Sometimes, people in remote Alaska are so familiar with their village, they don’t really understand that other people are not. “Take a right at Sue’s house, and a left at the field where Frank broke his leg last spring, and a right at the HTR.”

The extra useful person-They don‘t really know where it is, but, by golly, they will help you by telling you how to get there. “Take a right, no a left, I think, How many lights? One? Two? OK, well, keep going until you see the house. No wait, that’s the OTHER house. OK, wait, scratch that, the SECOND road, or something…”

casual direction-giver-Mostly this is a person working in a store. “excuse me, how do you get to the school?” they nod vaguely toward the east, and grunt.

The pointer-You find yourself in a larger town that have many roads. You are approximately in the middle, and hopelessly lost. You go into a grocery store, and are in the center isle. “Excuse me, where is the high school?” They point vaguely eastward, meaning that it’s in this direction, were you standing outside, and that you should leave the store, go around the building, take three lefts, a right, and then a left.

Useful directions-“Take a left on the main road, and the third right onto School Lane. The High school is the last building on the left.”

All about sunlight

2005-04-12T17:54:00.000-08:00

I am so all about this sun we've been having. In calibration, I have typed "sunlight" into google, and have found the following fascinating links:

http://www.die.net/earth/
a map of what parts of the earth are currently sunny! Anchorage, according to both the map and my living room window is sunny!

http://www.mywiseowl.com/articles/Sunlight
This site is supposed to be informational, and tell you things you didn't know about sunlight. One thing it says is:” Cultural aspects [of sunlight] - Many people find direct sunlight to be too bright for comfort". That’s not an aspect of out culture. That's just so you don't run around yelling "MY EEEYES!!! THEY BURN!" Like that.

http://www.whitefantom.com/goth/
A very interesting site about "Goth" culture that wants non-Goth people to separate violence with the image of Goth culture. My question, is this: Isn't the whole allure of Goth culture that the person will be associated with "dark" things? The second thing I'm thinking is that you are not really unique if you dress and act exactly the same. Wouldn't you be more unique if you dressed like a chicken? The site is, on the other hand, very informative, and actually pretty academic.

http://www.world-science.net/othernews/050310_suntubefrm.htm
This site is promoting "Sunlight in a tube", a product that collects sunlight from your roof, and pipes it into your house. I'm all for this, and want one for my house.

http://www.homestead.com/ahuda/sunlight.html
This is someone E-Journal, including many of his poems. They’re the kind that make sense and are spelled correctly. I should get some tips from him.

The human condition

2005-04-12T15:16:00.000-08:00

Money-the more you have, the more you need.

Anti-fatigue lotion cleanser

2005-04-12T10:49:00.000-08:00

So I have this bottle of cream on my desk that someone at work gave me. It's labeled "Anti-fatigue lotion cleanser", so I'm thinking it's lotion, and I use it to soften my hands, and it gets my hands all greasy, and then, later, after using it for days, I read the back on the bottle, and I learn that it's soap, and not lotion. Which would explain the anti-fatigue lotion CLEANSER. But you can't believe everything you read, because I have been using it for a week now, and I don't feel any less fatigued.

Inner beauty pagent

2005-04-11T21:47:00.000-08:00

They need to have an inner beauty pageant. They could award a bad-ass diamond tiara to some UN worker who dragged a bunch of orphans out of a warn-torn country at the risk of her life, or some scientist who cured AIDS or something. Better yet, an everyday hero, some woman who raised six kids by herself, and still got them fed, and bath-ed, school bus-ed and soccer practice-d, and things.

Miss. America

2005-04-11T21:38:00.000-08:00

As I write this. I’m watching the Miss. America competition. The women now have to talk about themselves. Poor contestants, having to make up personalities and all.

pet-name suggestions for people you don’t really love

2005-04-11T19:00:00.000-08:00

My sweet little error of judgment
My Emotional baggage bellhop
Honey buckets
The fall-back sweetie
The like of my life
My future alimony
Teeny tiny pencil boy
My red-eyed girl
The next-best thing
My little money tree

Please sign in in my new guest book

2005-04-10T22:26:00.000-08:00

This guest book is for me to save and print to hock on EBay when I become world famous.

Cool new toy for my blog

2005-04-10T22:20:00.000-08:00

Update

2005-04-10T16:44:00.000-08:00

It's an hour later, I'm still on my porch swing, and things are still awsome.

Life is just awsome!

2005-04-10T16:08:00.000-08:00

Here I am, on a beautiful, sunny day, sitting on a fabric porch swing that is like a cloud, and I still have wireless internet access, so i can still type, and the swing has a little holder for a beer or a soda thta you don't even need to remove to sip from. I am in HEAVEN!!!

New counter

2005-04-10T12:26:00.000-08:00

Some special education-related pick-up lines

2005-04-09T22:30:00.000-08:00

I‘ll always be there for you- I’ve got object permanence!
Wanna feel something tactually interesting?
You’ve used those O and M skills, and navigated your way into my heart.
Hold me tightly, I’m tactually defensive.
I can love you fiercely-with 70% accuracy in 5 out of 6 trials.
My love for you is as profound as my hearing loss.
I must have CVI, because your eyes are like stars against a neutral, contrasting background.
I’m a grasp switch-squeeze me and get a tangible result.
You are the feeding tube that I’ve hungered for.
I have a total communication philosophy-I’m skilled in both the oral and manual methods.

The irony of it all

2005-04-08T21:00:00.000-08:00

So I get a haircut to pamper myslef, and she did a great job, and she even fluffed it and stuff, and now I'm having a good hair day, (and I don't get to have a lot of good hair days) and I've got nowhere to go. Wait. That's not ironic, it just sucks. Oh well.

Things I have pondered TODAY.

2005-04-08T15:22:00.000-08:00

Wow, quiet can be loud.
If I was caught boogying around my office, would that come across as unperfessional?
I wonder how long it will take for that snowpile to melt. I bet awhile. I could SO throw snowballs in June.
Who can I throw them at who would think it’s ironic, and not immature? IS it ironic or just immature?
How would one sign “soggy butterfly?”
Trumph over adversity-drinking a health shake and forgoing the donuts.
What should I do this weekend? I feel like being outdoorsy in a wild and crazy way.
Do I think a choculear implant would be a good idea? I’m not touching that with a twenty foot pole and some rope.
Boy. My skin must be dry. My boobs are ichy. AH! HERE I GO-ICHING THEM, and no one has to know, cause my office mate is gone for the day…
How do I be delicate, but still get these ideas across in the report?
Miss or Mrs. I’m a Ms., thank you. I’ll draw my own little box and label it.
TAKE THAT, CO-WORKER!!!!
Wait a second, just because I slapped YOU, doesn’t mean that you get to slap ME. Even if it IS slap a co-worker day.
I have dancin’ feet today.
Why is the big hand not on the 4 and the little hand on the 6?

Things I wish my life had that my laptop allready has

2005-04-08T10:56:00.001-08:00

-An F11 button.
-the capicity to add more memory
-Spellcheck
-a botton that empties the trash
-Emoticons that you can choose, and always say what you mean.
-An "egnore person" button, like in IChat
-A "Find friends" button, like in Tribe.
-Volume and brightness buttons for my students.
-A big ol' trash icon that makes your mistakes go away.
-A clean slate like when you press the +button in Word
-The ability to represent yourself physically by any icon you can drag and drop from Google

derogatory terms for hair

2005-04-08T10:56:00.000-08:00

I wonder if wigs ever get jealous of real hair. You were there first, and I’m just a fake copy of what you once were, like that. Here is a modest list of suggested derogatory terms for hair that wigs might use if not being politically correct:
Root-head
Conditioner-user
Lather rinse repeat (as in “he’s….you know…*whisper* lather rinse repeat…”)
Follicle-child
Growin’ near the sweat pores (as in “I don’t know about him. I think he’s growin’ near the sweat pores.”)

Some facinating stuff I learned about hair while doing research for the next blog entry

2005-04-08T10:54:00.000-08:00

Introduction to skin and hair biology

The skin is the second largest organ in the body after the skeleton and of primary importance, integral to the survival of mammalian life, but often overlooked when examining the health and welfare of an individual. The heterogeneous skin structure is derived from the ectoderm and mesoderm of an embryo giving rise to the epidermis and dermis respectively. Within these generalized layers are specialized appendages also derived from the ectoderm and/or mesoderm including sensory nerves, sweat glands and hair follicles. The skin as a whole rests on subcutaneous tissue largely composed of a loose mesh of collagen fiber, fat cells and muscle tissue.

The average adult has over 3,000 square inches of skin surface area and the fat-free skin accounts for at least 6 percent of an individual's total weight. In other words, the fat free skin of a 150 pound person weighs at least 9 pounds. The density of of structures in the skin varies considerably dpeending on the body location, but on average one square centimeter of skin contains about 10 hair follicles and 15 sebaceous glands, 100 sweat glands, half a meter of blood vessels, 2 meters of nerves, with 3,000 sensory cells at the ends of nerve fibers, 200 nerve endings to record pain, 25 pressure receptors for the perception of tactile stimuli, 2 sensory receptors for cold, and 12 sensory receptors for heat.

In short, the skin acts as a barrier and is the primary organ through which we interact with the external world.

Soggy Butterflys

2005-04-08T10:18:00.000-08:00

Butterflies can’t get their wings wet, or they can’t fly. How fascinating. I would be the kind of butterfly who would be SO under a leaf, all huddled up, while some adventurous guy butterfly was all out in the rain saying “look, I can get wet, and still fly!” and then drop to the ground. Cause maybe guy butterfly’s are like that. (This comes from my observation of the teenage boy riding a bike over the railing of a bridge yesterday). Sometimes it’s good to be safe, cause hay, not dropping to the ground. On the other hand, I never get to see the rain, or even a rainbow, and I’ll never know that soothing cold of the rainwater on my wings. Maybe it’s worth the drop to the ground.

Here it is in verse, but I think i like the first draft better...
Butterflies can’t get their wings wet,
They’ll get soggy.
And die.
According to PBS.
How fascinating.
I always wanted to be a butterfly.
Well,
not now.
What frailty!
To need water,
but then die
If you get wet.
I‘d hide under a leaf,
all huddled up,
pondering the irony
at the mention of a storm cloud.
while adventurous butterflies
were out in the rain shouting
“look, I can get wet, and still fly!”
as they drop to their deaths.
‘cause maybe some butterflies are like that.
I believe
it’s good to be safe.
because
There are suns to be fluttered under
And nectar to eat.
But
I never get to see lightning,
or even the rain,
and I’ll never know
the soothing cold
of the rainwater on my body.
Maybe, in a way,
it’s worth the drop to the ground.

Smart and clever

2005-04-08T10:11:00.000-08:00

A smart person gets into Harvard Dental and earns enough money to pay for it.
A clever person get's into Harvard, and will earn enough money to pay for it, but goes to UConn instead, saving $100,000.
You go, Rosie.

Tom

2005-04-08T10:10:00.000-08:00

I know you’re in there
I can see you looking out.
And I know you see me looking in.
Such a great distence,
This two feet between us.

2005-04-07T16:35:00.001-08:00

Things that have gone through the Mishy Noggin today

2005-04-07T16:35:00.000-08:00

I have had such writer’s block when it comes to my blog. then I thought, well, Mishy, it's not like nothing has gone through your head today, just write about that, so here are some things I have thought today (yesterday, Thursday):
Boy, this "spider ball" is wonderful in every way.
Who is that guy that just walked by my office window?
OHHHH! Cake in the break room! Who made the cake? Thank you person.
There's a switch that can be activated by moving your eyebrow! That rocks.
My socks SO don't match. they're both white, and yet, so different.
Why don't people just yell at EACHOTHER rather than yell at me ABOUT them.
Boy is my big toenail getting humongous.
There are free chair massages this weekend? I am SOOOO there.
Eating a healthy lunch isn't nearly as rewarding if no one sees you do it.
Stupid soda machine-won't take my dolor-Take THAT you stupid soda machine.
Oh Hi sun! Come here, right on my paper. Nope, little to the left, little more. Yea, right there.
Wow, are my shoes noisy on this floor.
Do you know what I would do for a big hug right now? Like pay a million dollars.
I bet a Braille stylus would make a great thing to poke muggers with, cause it's so pointy and would make a great mugger-fender-offer.
Why don't they just make one universal cord? Why do they all have to have different little thingies, and then go and get themselves lost on the TTY table?
OK. WHO ATE ALL THE CAKE?
What's that word again? How do you spell it? Do you know what I mean? Just read my mind and write THAT.
If a picture is worth a thousand words, then I can stop writing, seeing as how I put six pictures in this report already.
Thank you. I learned a lot from writing it.
Are these “nutritional shakes” REALLY that healthy, or is it just a ploy?

If I could have any job

2005-04-05T15:07:00.000-08:00

I love my job, but if suddenly there were no more deaf kids, here are some careers I would consider taking up:

A Ghirardelli chocolate taste-tester

Miss. America

A truck driver with a cool handle, like "The sexy flash".

A make-up person for Cerc De Solei

Johnny Depp's masseuse.

The Chucky cheeze guy (who, for real, I almost was)

The woman who gets to press the button to have the cars move for crash tests.

A stunt double who gets put on fire, but then gets put out really quick when the camera’s off.

An air traffic controller, a job I had for three minutes on the runway in Kiana.

An opera singer who gets to play the "Queen of the Night" in The Magic Flute, and sing that super high note as fans applaud.

A pyrotechnic expert who sets up fireworks.

That about sums it up.

You know what?

2005-04-05T15:04:00.000-08:00

When I hold my little babies, I'm rocking them, but in a sence, they're rocking me too.

Things I wish would go past my office window while I work.

2005-04-05T13:01:00.000-08:00

So far today, my view has been kind of boring. I have a few suggestions to the powers that be of possible things that could go by my window to entertain the Mishy.

A ding-dong truck-How I long for the familiar jingle, and the dirty, unshaved man with the ice cream. I would SO run out and eat myself some ice cream. I may even buy my office mate one, since she would probably see the truck too.

Some more interesting birdies. So far, the birdies are still in their winter homes. Like old people to Florida, the birdies have gone away for the winter.

SUN!!!!!!

The Publishers Clearinghouse Guy with a giant cardboard check for me.

Jason

People from my work in a Congo line, which happens all too rarely.

SUN!!!

A moose. That happened for real one time, but this moose would have to do tricks, so I could get pictures and sell them for a million dollars, or possibly win the “My Alaska” photo contest.

That bully from elementary school in her McDonalds uniform.

But, of course, I would settle for some SUN!!!

This thing on top

2005-04-03T18:58:00.000-08:00

This is either a web stats thingy, or a mind altering icon...you decide...

2005-04-03T18:46:00.000-08:00

Check out my new counter!!!

2005-04-03T18:26:00.000-08:00

I am not only cool, but my numbers are FLAMIN!

2005-04-03T18:25:00.000-08:00

Counters

Squid and seaweed samitch

2005-04-02T21:39:00.000-09:00

I got this from the website about yucky kid stuff mentioned earlier, and figured that it would be great to bring to a potluck where I didn't really like the people. That, or i REALLY like them, and felt REALLY comfortable with them!!!

Ingredients:
Hot dogs - four (or 8 if everyone is very hungry)
Hamburger buns - one for each hot dog
Lettuce

Directions:
Starting about one-half inch from one end of a hot dog, pierce it with a sharp knife and slice lengthwise down the middle.
Turn it one quarter and repeat, so you have four long "legs" attached at one end.
Cook like a regular hot dog on the stovetop, grill or campfire, getting help from an adult.
The "legs" will curl naturally as the hot dog cooks, so when it's done it will look just like a squid.
Arrange some lettuce on the bottom half of a hamburger bun and place the "squid" on top.
Punch a hole in the center of the top of the bun and put it over the squid with the head sticking out.
Now you have a squid and seaweed sandwich!!!

Blog template change

2005-04-02T17:04:00.000-09:00

Today I was feeling leafy and green, so I changed my blog template.

Stuff

2005-04-02T00:47:00.000-09:00

I love the word “stuff”. It can be used in almost any situation where you don’t really wanna say what you need to, you forgot what to say, or as a substute for almost any other noun or verb. An example:
“Where have you been all night young lady?!!!”
“Doin’ stuff.”
See? Your momma ain’t gonna buy it, but still, you’ve postoned punishment for a second. “Stuff” is all about filling in gaps and postponing the enivitable.
In honor of the word “stuff”, I have typed the word into Google, and come up with some fascinating information. A list of some notable examples:

Free Stuff Directory
A list of useful free
stuff on the Internet
www.freestuff4.us

How Stuff Works
HowStuffWorks explains hundreds of subjects, from car engines to lock-picking to ESP, using clear language and tons of illustrations.
www.howstuffworks.com

Slashdot: News for nerds, stuff that matters
News for Nerds. Stuff that Matters.
slashdot.org/

Welcome to the Yuckiest Site on the Internet!
Educational science entertainment about yucky things such as worms. Club Yucky, games, and recipes.
yucky.kids.discovery.com/

My fav is the yucky kids one. I’m all about the worms and the yucky recipes. Of course, I am also all about the free stuff, so it’s gonna be a toss up…On the other hand, Slashdot has this interesting story, which, according to “Zonk”, (a nod to my father's personal hero, Zonker Harris, I assume) is from the ” the teeeeeeeeny- tiiiiiiiiny-thingie dept."

PaSTE writes "From the article, 'US scientists have managed to measure the mass of a cluster of xenon atoms at just a few billionths of a trillionth of a gram - or a few zeptograms. The record measurement is in the mass range of individual protein molecules, and the detection was made using sensitive scales developed at Caltech.' Another big leap forward for nanotechnology."
I‘m really all about “Zonk”. He seems funny. And go nanotechnology. What would the X-Files have been without you?

Mishy, the food critic rates airline snacks

2005-04-02T00:43:00.000-09:00

-The “honey Dijon potato chips”
Wildly yummy with just a taste of garlic aftertaste. A-
-The pretzels
Not worth the piece of cardboard they’re made of. Yuck. D+
-The sesame snacks
nectar of the gods. Ask the stewardess for seconds, and tell her that you’ll “hold” your seatmate’s portion for him because he’s asleep. Promptly eat all three. A+
-The vinegar potatoes chips
Ya gotta have a stomach of iron, but worth every moment of heartburn. B+
-The “moose’s paw” or “bear paw” chocolate in the shape of a bear’s claw. That in and of itself gets it an A-. Portion is small though. Ask for thirds.
-The fake chex mix-Possibly non-toxic. A yucky take on a yucky food. F+

Mishy the food critic rates airline snacks

2005-04-02T00:13:00.000-09:00

Deaf-blind education girl

2005-04-01T14:57:00.000-09:00

I think that it would be a lot more exciting to be a teacher of the deaf-blind if we had our own superhero and a corresponding figurine that kids could play with, and thus admire.
“Daddy! look! Deaf-blind education girl is performing a tympanoplasty!”
“That’s nice honey” Like that.
And we need a uniform. Something spandex, with a cape. And possibly thigh-high red patent leather boots, like Wonder Woman has. Cause it would not only be kind of cool-looking, it would also be visually and tactually more interesting.
And we would need accessories. Because every good superhero has accessories.
“Mommy! Mommy! I want a CVI assessment kit, complete with black sheet to make the background less visually complex.”
“No dear, you already have two kinds of switches and a brailler.”
“Ahhhhhhhhhhhh. Moooooom!” And all these little kids would play deaf-blind educator girl, and force her brother to be her sidekick-“half-naked pool boy”.
I can see the related TV show now. “Faster then a 2000 Hz sound wave, able to teach cause and effect in the blink of an eye. Is it a calendar system? Is it a leaf switch? No! IT’S…..Deaf blind education girl!!!!! Dumdumduuuuuuuuuuummmm!”
Yea, that would make my job a lot more glamorous.
But I’ll settle for developing language capacities and stuff.
For now.

Two poems about my hotel

2005-03-31T19:04:00.004-09:00

The ocean roars
And the waves swell
And the driven rain pours out onto the dirt road
And I
I shut the window
And the blinds
And hunker down for some TV
In the rain forest
Far far from home.

There’s an unmarked doorway in my hotel.
What could possibly be behind it?
It wasn’t locked.
But wasn’t numbered either.
In the movies, it might be another demension
Where everything’s similar
But not exactly the same.
This isn’t TV.
It was just the laundry room.

How come?

2005-03-31T19:04:00.003-09:00

Why is it that they’ve come up with a microwave to boil water in, like, two minutes, but they haven’t come up with something that would flash freeze a cup of water in the same time?
Oh. I guess ‘cause that wouldn’t really have any applications in real life.
It would be cool though.
And, hay, tons of ice cubes at the push of a button.

The pessimist and the optimist

2005-03-31T19:04:00.002-09:00

The pessimist-
I’m 740 miles away from home.
The optimist-
I’m 740 airline miles closer to Hawaii.

Ways to tell if you are staying in a fancy-smancy hotel

2005-03-31T19:04:00.001-09:00

By the numbers of towels. If you’re fancy-smancy, maybe you like the opportunity to use towels left and right for your every whim- “oh, I washed my hands, and they’re a little damp still-I think I’ll use this fluffy white bath towel towel for that. My shoulders are a tad cold while I brush my hair after my shower. Think I’ll wrap another fluffy white bath towel around them. ” (OK. OK. Sometimes I kind of do that, but that SO doesn’t leave this blog)
By the extent of bath/grooming products supplied. The tiny, cute little bar of soap in the paper wrapper has to be given to you by, like, law or something, but the shower cap? The separate shampoo AND conditioner? That’s fancy. The sewing kit? THAT’S fancy SMANCY.
By how nice the front desk staff have to be to mean people. Someone comes down to complain about the quality of the phone book they have been forced to live with. Does the woman at the desk A) Run out and get a newer one? B) Fold her arms, and ask if crabby-lady would care for some cheese to go with that whine.
By the number of things on the desk for you to read. A phone book? Not fancy. A folder listing suggestions for local entertainment? Fancy. A folder AND a free note pad and pencil? Fancy SMANCY.
One time, I stayed in a hotel in Canada with my family. I was probably eight. And all of the ashtrays (the kind that stand on the floor with sand in them) had the logo of the hotel chain pressed into the sand. That qualifies a hotel as fancy smancy, hands down, negating all other criteria.

My evening

2005-03-31T19:04:00.000-09:00

My feet are weary
The twilight dark and dreary
But past the hills and turns
a candel burns
for me
So I press on.

Ways to tell if you are staying in a fancy-smancy hotel

2005-03-31T19:00:00.000-09:00

2005-03-31T18:59:00.001-09:00

My evening

2005-03-31T18:58:00.000-09:00

The ocean roars
And the waves swell
And the driven rain pours out onto the dirt road
And I
I shut the window
And the blinds
And hunker down for some TV
In the rain forest
Far far from home.

My night

2005-03-31T18:55:00.001-09:00

The ocean roars
And the waves swell
And the driven rain pours out onto the dirt road
And I
I shut the window
And the blinds
And hunker down for some TV
In the rain forest
Far far from home.

Wine tasting

2005-03-31T18:55:00.000-09:00

Unlike in poetry, I just realized that you can use really any word to describe the taste of wine, and the worse the simile, the better you are at it.
“I detect a fruity, floral scent, mixed with a note of notebook paper and a city bus.” Like that. Substitute any other noun for “smell”. But you need to swish the glass in small, thoughtful circles, as you sniff hoityily. Making suggestions as to what foods it would complement are a must. Choose something expensive, but random, like oysters.
Coming soon-the Mushy school of wine appreciation.

Go Physics

2005-03-30T14:03:00.000-09:00

That a float plane made of metal:
A) is strong enough to carry thousands of pounds of cargo but can:
B) float
C) fly
D) is strong enough to witstand the impact of the water when landing

To the guy who just restocked the vending machine with Wheat Thins

2005-03-29T07:42:00.000-09:00

You are a god.

A little poem

2005-03-29T07:30:00.000-09:00

From my TV remote
to a little boat
to a plane (a float)
to a taxie
to the hotel
to the school
to a student
who is out sick.